When working with difficult children we may ask ourselves, "What is wrong with that child?" as if the blaming question will change their behavior. Unfortunately, we're sending subvert messages to the child who in turn, internalizes our unintended messaging. It is more helpful to reframe our own behaviors and consider asking instead, "What might have happened to this child for them to react in this way?” (Shanker, 2017). This shift in thought helps us change the way we engage with a difficult child and the way we view their behaviors.
More and more young children are exhibiting challenging behaviors as they return to the classroom. Many are being misdiagnosed with ADHD when the reason for their behavior is stress or trauma in their lives (Van der Kolk, 2014; Perry & Szalavitz, 2007). The pandemic has had a severe impact on nearly every child in some way. As educators, it is our duty to have a thorough understanding of every child's experience during the pandemic as we shift back into classroom learning. In the last two years, our students were isolated from their friends and family, their parents may have experienced the loss of a loved one or a job, or they might have had to move; each having a lasting effect on a child’s life. Their behavior is a direct reflection of the trauma that they may have experienced that doesn't just go away when they return to school in person. An educator's responsibility is to be able to identify these traumas and be able to shift their lesson plan to allow every child in their classroom to succeed at their own pace.
I am presently teaching a course for our Master’s students, where we are exploring how to create therapeutic classrooms for children. In a therapeutic classroom, the key is to provide a balance between allowing children to freely express their thoughts and feelings while providing them a safe structure for this expression (Koplow, 2007). This allows children to feel a sense of mastery and competency to navigate their world, becoming emotionally stronger, more resilient toward criticism, developing greater self-worth and self-esteem, and managing negative thoughts. The teacher-child relationship that is nurtured in these classrooms has a lasting effect on a child's behavior. When a child has developed positive relationships with their teacher, this leads to a more resilient child able to face adversity (Lipscomb et al., 2019). This important connection can start with a simple question, "How are you doing?"
My Masters' students learn how to overcome the challenges in every scenario as it relates to a child's success in the classroom - whether that child is difficult to teach or not. To learn more about how therapeutic classroom settings can positively impact you and your students, please sharon.bacharach
aju.edu (email me).
References:
Kolk, B. v. d. (2015). The body keeps the score: Mind, brain and body in the transformation of trauma. Penguin.
Koplow, L. (2007). Unsmiling faces (2nd ed.). Teachers College Press.
Loomis, A. M. (2018). The role of preschool as a point of intervention and prevention for trauma-exposed children: Recommendations for practice, policy, and research. Topics in Early Childhood Special Education, 38(3), 134-145. https://doi.org/10.1177/0271121418789254
Perry, B. D., & Szalavitz, M. (2007). The boy who was raised as a dog. Basic Books.
Shanker, S. (2016). Self-reg: How to help your child (and you) break the stress cycle and successfully engage with life. Penguin.