During my reading of this week's parasha, parashat Vayishlach, and in particular chapter 32, I was struck anew by the image of Jacob - a terrified, emotionally broken man, writhing in his fear, anticipating not a reunion with his brother Esau, but a confrontation. Jacob's anxiety is palpable; his movements, frenetic. I feel for Jacob. But honestly, my sympathy falls to Esau.
Jacob's behavior through the years is somewhat questionable. When the brothers were young, Jacob acquired Esau's birthright by withholding food while Esau was desperately hungry (Genesis 25:32). And when Jacob and Esau are roughly 40, Jacob steals Esau's blessing from their father Isaac (Genesis 27:28-29). Also, Jacob plays his own games with Laban (Chapter 30) and even in his relationship with God, Jacob barters (see Jacob's vow to God in Genesis 28:20-21). And finally, when wrestling with the angel in Chapter 32:25-27, the angel begs to be freed as daybreak arrives. But here again, Jacob, in an advantaged position, refuses to let the angel go until he receives the angel's blessing.
Contrast this to the Esau. First, in fulfilling his familial role and doing what comes naturally to him, Esau hunts and brings food to his home. Upon his return, and in his exhaustion and hunger, Esau sells his birthright in exchange for food. Years later, his father's blessing is stolen by Jacob, to which he responds in Chapter 27:38 with deep pain: Esau, with a pitched voice and tears, begs for his father's blessing. When hearing his father, Isaac, commands Jacob to not take a Canaanite wife, he, Esau, wishing to please his parents, takes a new wife in a daughter of Ishmael and descendant of Abraham. And finally in our parasha, during the reunion scene of Chapter 33, as Jacob expects the worst of Esau, Esau runs to greet Jacob, embraces Jacob, kisses his brother and weeps.
In looking through commentaries I found very little on Esau that would help understand his emotional state and inner character. Many of the Rabbis equate Esau's character to that of ancient Rome; militaristic, materialistic and morally corrupt. In our time I think we have much more to add to our understanding of our historic personalities than simply equate them to the behaviors of past generations. Our ancestors - their accomplishments, their courage and faith, their foibles and fallacies - are a part of us. And to integrate the lessons of Torah, we must fully reflect on all personalities.
Perhaps Esau is heroic. His parents' love for him is conflicted. His brother has deceived him on multiple occasions. His wives have been rejected by his parents. And Isaac's blessing for Esau (Genesis 27:39, 40) offers little hope, concluding with Isaac saying that Esau "shall serve your brother (Jacob); But when you grow restive, You shall break his yoke from your neck."
Esau's reaction to Jacob having stolen his blessing is to want to kill Jacob. How many of us with siblings have not wanted to figuratively wring their necks? And in the narrative, it's not like Jacob ran from his home with Esau following him with sword in hand. Esau was mad. And rightfully so! But in the 20 years that follow, Esau never pursues Jacob. Esau lets time pass, emotions cool and, when Jacob wishes to return to his family land, Esau greets Jacob with open arms, tears of true feeling, and the hope of Jacob returning home. Esau grew restive and the yolk fell from his neck, while Jacob, as is chapter 33:14-18, refuses the invitation to return home.
Esau, too, is a teacher among Israel.
Shabbat Shalom.