Sometimes we see it coming, and sometimes it catches us by surprise. Over the course of any given year we somehow manage to balance family obligations, work responsibilities, tending to our physical spaces, and, if we are lucky, we give ourselves a little attention as well. Still, there comes a point (or many points) in most people's yearly cycle when the sheer amount of work and responsibilities accumulate and overwhelm us to the point of exhaustion. To compound matters, each spring the Jewish tradition offers us Passover, an opportunity to experience--if only briefly during a seder--freedom from the stress and anxiety of life. Yet, Passover also brings with it a highly complicated and time-intensive set of tasks to prepare us to truly experience freedom. We empty our kitchens, rigorously clean, buy new food, line our counters, kasher our dishes, and prepare to have friends, family, and strangers join us at our Seder tables. Remarkably, we try to get it all done a few days beforehand!
And sometimes - it all feels like too much. Each one of us has a unique reaction to this phenomenon, but I imagine you have reached the point--at least once--where you want to close your eyes, pretend none of it exists, throw your hands in the air, and just pray that it will all magically get done. At the very moment when we want to feel like the redemption of Passover is just over the horizon, the nitty-gritty of life and preparations can overwhelm us into forgetting the big picture.
This week we celebrate the fourth of the special Torah readings that lead us to Passover, Parashat Ha-Hodesh. A special passage from Exodus 12 will accompany the regular weekly cycle to announce that the first month of the Jewish calendar is Nissan and it is quickly approaching- i.e., Passover is near. Our reliving the experience of moving from bondage to redemption is but a couple weeks away and it is time to start preparing your physical and spiritual domains. The special Torah reading opens:
"The Lord said to Moses and Aaron in the land of Egypt: This month shall mark for you the beginning of the months; it shall be the first of months of the year for you." (Exodus 12:1-2)
The ancient rabbis ask a seemingly nit-picky question on this verse. Why is it that God had to specify to Moses and Aaron that the month of Nissan will be marked 'for you', twice? Shouldn't it be obvious that since the first verse tells us that God is speaking to them that, in fact, this message is meant for them. The Torah could have been just as clear without these two words (for you)!
Midrash Shemot Rabbah answers for God and says: "in the past the marking of time rested solely in my hands, as scripture teaches, 'He (God) made the moon to mark the seasons, the sun knows when to set.' (Psalms 104:19) But from this point on the marking of time is being entrusted into your hands (for you). If you say yes-then yes (your witnessing the new moon is valid to set the first day of the month). If you say no (it is not the new moon) - then no, it isn't."
This midrash comes to teach us that while the creation and initial managing of time was part of God's purview, it has been handed over to us, humanity. God still owns time, but our newfound freedom is the ability to govern it. The recognition of this idea, then, impacts these verses when read in the context of the day being Parashat Ha-Hodesh. We not only read this piece of Torah to announce that Passover is near, but to remind us that our opportunity to time-manage is a sacred pursuit. It is God's true gift of freedom to the Jewish people. Slavery is the act of being acted upon, where someone else has complete control of your time. Freedom is just the opposite. Even when we are up to our necks in work, beneath the stress is a gift from God-the freedom to set and mark our own time.
How many times have you heard yourself say, "If I just had a little more time, I could get it done," yet if/or when you do find that time another responsibility appears out of nowhere?
The call of the new month forces us to rethink how we view our time. The essential question is not how to create more time, but how can we choose to manage the time in front of us? Who and what do we prioritize? What new challenges do we take on and what might we say no to? This tangible act of balancing priorities alongside an already full calendar is an expression of freedom that is filled with sanctity.
And so the excess of Passover preparations-with all of the added stress and anxiety they may bring-can actually be a catalyst (along with Exodus 12) for recognizing the beauty of calendar control. Each act of cleaning, kashering, purchasing, and more cleaning vividly reminds us that ultimate goal of getting to the Passover seder is to relive the story of our redemption. Leaving Egypt, no longer were we subjected to severe limits from other people on how we chose to spend our time.
May we find the strength and courage to do just that.
Shabbat Shalom