Only God knows if / when / where / why you were on a blind date. All I can remember from the last one I was on, about twenty years ago, is that it was in the lobby of the King David hotel in Yerushalayim. I have no recollection of the name of the person I was with or what he looked like. I do remember the shock on his face when he asked me: "If you could go back anywhere in time and history, where would you like to go?" I replied, "Can I take my toilet with me? Because if not, I won't go back further than indoor plumbing, but if yes, I'll give your question a second thought."
When thinking about receiving the Torah, the image of a blind date stands out for the many parallels between them: the emphasis on preparation, the unknown, the trust underlying the willingness to embrace the moment, the surrender into the encounter as it unfolds, the knowledge that no matter what happens, you will not come out of the experience the way you entered into it. I'm sure you can muster up some parallels yourself.
It is from this point that I invite us to observe chapter 19 of Shmote (Exodus) and the detail that goes into preparing for receiving the Torah. I am particularly interested in God's concern that we not come close to the mountain that repeats itself multiple times - verse 12 and verses 21-24. In verse 12 we hear of this the first time, God tells Moshe to warn us not to come close to the mountain, or even touch it, being warned of a death sentence (does this remind you of the Tree of Life in the Garden of Eden?); the second time, after Moshe has already ascended the mountain to encounter God and is once again sent down. Moshe's response to God seems so simple and appropriate: "but You already told us not to come close, why would You think that we wouldn't adhere to Your demand?"
Why was God so concerned, and what was S/He really telling Moshe?
Reb Levi Yitzchak of Berdichev (1740-1809) has addressed this question with the help of the Ramban's (Nachmanedis, d. 1270) commentary on the verse: "If you awaken or arouse the love till it desires". (Shir HaShirim / the Song of Songs 2:6). The word 'desire' in Hebrew is techpatz, derived from the root CH,P,TZ, as in the word 'chefetz' - object / vessel. It is in this manner that the verse in Shir Hashirim is read by the Ramban and Reb Levi Yitzchak as saying: do not evoke this emotion of love until you have a way to contain it.
Reb Levi Yitzchak understands that God's major concern in preparing the Children of Israel is that they have a way to contain the experience of receiving the Torah; to contain the experience of standing at the foot of the mountain, hearing God's voice, and receiving the 10 commandments. This is a concern that pertains to parents, teachers, rabbis, friends (remember the surprise party that bombed). When preparing for a life altering experience, or for granting someone with a gift that exceeds the realm of reasonable, do we remember to ask ourselves how the other will receive this gift, and what we can do to enable them to contain the moment.
It is not that God was sending us mixed messages. God isn't saying: "I want to bestow you with the Torah just as long that you don't come too close to Me". On the contrary, God is saying: "I want to share my Torah with you in a way that we will be able to share it forever. I'm going to give you something to hold on to that will hold you in the moment. I'm going to give you one commandment before I give you the commandments!" It is in this act that God takes a stand of utmost lovingkindness (chesed). God creates a venue that promises us the ability to stand in God's presence and receive all that God wants to grant us with.
Before revealing God's self to us as Legislator or Commander, God reveals God's self to us as Compassionate Teacher and Beloved Partner.
It is in this guise that Reb Levi Yitzchak says:
"And indeed Yisrael when standing at Har Sinai, there they had an arousal / awakening for the love and awe of the Creator, Blessed be He, and there needs to be something that will contract /contain within it the arousal / awakening of awe and love."
The Master of the World was not only holding on to His/Her trepidation on the brink of this blind date between the Children of Israel and the Torah (and Him/Her as bestower of the Torah), but rather, God was also holding on to our love and awe and trepidation on the brink of a blind date with the Torah.
May we hold and be held as we offer and receive the divine gifts of our lives.
Shabbat shalom.